Upon awakening spiritually, I eventually ended up being depressed about my spiritual life and it was all I could do to do physical activities to hold onto my existence as a being. Activities such as going to the gym or doing something that I used to enjoy just for the sake of hanging onto my grip on life and not falling into oblivion. Plus my spiritual life sucked, so focusing on the physical was almost an escape from that life to some degree. It was as if I had two lives. One spiritual and one physical and somehow I separated them mentally. When I focused on my spiritual life which was a depressing dump, I just felt endless sorrow, grief and emotional pain. So I focused on my physical life to get away from my spiritual life so i could remain "livable".
An interesting thing about spiritual depression is that, when I cried tears, it didn't feel like it was coming from me but more like it was my soul that was crying and using my body as a medium to cry human tears. That it would have cried with or without a body but since it was incarnated in one it's crying was human. Weird stuff huh. Well I hope that you reading things can relate otherwise this probably sounds like I'm on some hallucinogenic weed or something. I can assure you it's all me.
Now, if being depressed spiritually wasn't depressing, just going through it depressed me even more and what's worse is that I can't talk about it with anyone because it would just go right over their heads and I'd be met with blank faces. May worried faces and ones that have their phone out to call for help.
If you are able to relate to this and know exactly what I'm talking about, I am so sorry. I could not wish this on any enemy. It is spiritual torture and agony and of course emotions and the mind are all drawn into this mumbo jumbo. I advise seeking out a good psychic to help guide you back to the Light. This is all obviously a spiritual issue. Life would be WAY more simpler if I didn't have a soul but then I'd be a zombie.
Sunday, 23 June 2013
Becoming more spiritual attracts others of the same
It seems like as I work on my spirituality and since my spiritual awakening I seem to be meeting people who are also spiritual and have psychic gifts by chance. For example, I was introduced to Mary Kay and ended up opening up my business with them and somehow my director sat me down one day and said 'don't you feel like there's someone else inside you sometimes? You need to meditate to clear all the confusion thinking so that you can handle your business more efficiently'. I just looked at her weird. I guess she thought that I didn't know what she was talking about, but boy did I. We ended up talking til 4 am in the morning at the office about ghosts and psychic experiences.
Then just last night I was at a dinner party in which I was invited to by a lady I met at a shopping mall in one of the stores. At her party I met a 37 year old woman and she just started talking to me about how she can read people's energies and pick them up. She also has strong intuition about objects or things that are bad luck/energy. She sees things in dreams etc. She can even connect to people's energies and read them for their past, present and future as well as pick up energy and translate them as the other's thought (much like what I do). It seems that she can control her gifts to a degree or things just download into her easily but not really for me. She took a real liking to me and she kept saying that maybe it was Fate to come to the party and to meet me. That maybe the purpose of her going to the party was to meet me.
I started to think about all the others times when someone told me that there was something about me that they were drawn to and intrigued them. It made me feel like a specimen. I really don't know what they're picking up. If it's something my soul achieved in another life or what, and they find it drawing.
(haha much like the ants I suppose)
Most days I just feel dull, depressed and disinterested with life, so it perplexes me when someone tells me they're really glad to have met me and that maybe the purpose for them to come to some event was to meet me. I do believe in Fateful meetings and perhaps these people are right. I just don't feel the same way about them or if I do I just don't care enough. I'm on a hard and lonely soul journey that no one else but professional psychics can help me with. Maybe they're attracted to the fact that I am on a journey. A lot of souls are lost and maybe they sense that I'm on a quest. I'm going somewhere. I don't even know if I'll make it anywhere but I am doing something.
Then just last night I was at a dinner party in which I was invited to by a lady I met at a shopping mall in one of the stores. At her party I met a 37 year old woman and she just started talking to me about how she can read people's energies and pick them up. She also has strong intuition about objects or things that are bad luck/energy. She sees things in dreams etc. She can even connect to people's energies and read them for their past, present and future as well as pick up energy and translate them as the other's thought (much like what I do). It seems that she can control her gifts to a degree or things just download into her easily but not really for me. She took a real liking to me and she kept saying that maybe it was Fate to come to the party and to meet me. That maybe the purpose of her going to the party was to meet me.
I started to think about all the others times when someone told me that there was something about me that they were drawn to and intrigued them. It made me feel like a specimen. I really don't know what they're picking up. If it's something my soul achieved in another life or what, and they find it drawing.
(haha much like the ants I suppose)
Most days I just feel dull, depressed and disinterested with life, so it perplexes me when someone tells me they're really glad to have met me and that maybe the purpose for them to come to some event was to meet me. I do believe in Fateful meetings and perhaps these people are right. I just don't feel the same way about them or if I do I just don't care enough. I'm on a hard and lonely soul journey that no one else but professional psychics can help me with. Maybe they're attracted to the fact that I am on a journey. A lot of souls are lost and maybe they sense that I'm on a quest. I'm going somewhere. I don't even know if I'll make it anywhere but I am doing something.
Meditation Attracts Ants
I haven't seen any satisfactory posts on the web about this and I've only just begun to meditate but I have noticed a phenomena that seems to be increasing as I continue my meditative work. I hope others can verify some common experiences. I've been out of balance spiritually for quite awhile and after much advice and instruction that I should start meditating, I started. In the beginning about a week ago, I started to meditate in my back yard as I figured that being with nature would help to heal me faster spiritually.
Now in the beginning I didn't really notice anything unusual, but now I definitely think that there's something going on. It's ants.When I first started to meditate about a week ago, I would sit in the sun and meditate early afternoon and sure there were ants that were around but they didn't bother me much. By the third day, I noticed that there were a lot of ants around and one or two would climb on my foot but just as quickly climb off and be on their way. Now I thought that I just happened to sit down in the middle of their foraging time and it was my fault that they were around me. So I continued to meditate and I'd find patches of grass where it'd be clear and I picked earlier in the morning when it seemed like they were less active. This was a bit better and eventually their activity picked up which I assumed was because it was getting hotter and closer to noon. Ok. So, the days pass and I start choosing an area of grass that has no ants in my site and I decided to sit in the shade where it was cooler. After ten minutes, an ant crawls on me, nothing unusual, 15 minutes, two ants crawl on me in another few minutes I can't concentrate on my meditation because there would be like five ants crawling on me at once and they don't just crawl off me. They stay on and seem to be exploring me out of curiosity.I look around and I'd see the grass around me had lots of ants crawling around. About an ant at every inch of grass. This was since the beginning but today when I got up to move indoors I noticed that the rest of the backyard was clear but my area seemed to have gathered ants! This isn't the first day. The number of ants in my vicinity seem to be increasing each day I meditate and it doesn't matter what patch of grass I meditate on. It would go from no ant in sight to a population just crawling around me and on me. So I definitely think that something's going on with the ants like they can pick up some energy from me or something and it's attracting them. I really wanted to find some information on the web about how ants can perhaps sense energy changes and be attracted to or repelled by it.
Even research papers don't seem to address this. I'm thinking that these ants are more sensitive to energy and probably the earth's magnetic field than we think.
Now in the beginning I didn't really notice anything unusual, but now I definitely think that there's something going on. It's ants.When I first started to meditate about a week ago, I would sit in the sun and meditate early afternoon and sure there were ants that were around but they didn't bother me much. By the third day, I noticed that there were a lot of ants around and one or two would climb on my foot but just as quickly climb off and be on their way. Now I thought that I just happened to sit down in the middle of their foraging time and it was my fault that they were around me. So I continued to meditate and I'd find patches of grass where it'd be clear and I picked earlier in the morning when it seemed like they were less active. This was a bit better and eventually their activity picked up which I assumed was because it was getting hotter and closer to noon. Ok. So, the days pass and I start choosing an area of grass that has no ants in my site and I decided to sit in the shade where it was cooler. After ten minutes, an ant crawls on me, nothing unusual, 15 minutes, two ants crawl on me in another few minutes I can't concentrate on my meditation because there would be like five ants crawling on me at once and they don't just crawl off me. They stay on and seem to be exploring me out of curiosity.I look around and I'd see the grass around me had lots of ants crawling around. About an ant at every inch of grass. This was since the beginning but today when I got up to move indoors I noticed that the rest of the backyard was clear but my area seemed to have gathered ants! This isn't the first day. The number of ants in my vicinity seem to be increasing each day I meditate and it doesn't matter what patch of grass I meditate on. It would go from no ant in sight to a population just crawling around me and on me. So I definitely think that something's going on with the ants like they can pick up some energy from me or something and it's attracting them. I really wanted to find some information on the web about how ants can perhaps sense energy changes and be attracted to or repelled by it.
Even research papers don't seem to address this. I'm thinking that these ants are more sensitive to energy and probably the earth's magnetic field than we think.
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